The Most Bittersweet Day

I finally received my first honest-to-goodness piece of great news. I was accepted into the MFA in Creative Writing & Publishing Arts program at the University of Baltimore! I was so thrilled to receive an email that contained a sentence other than "We are sorry to inform you..." or "We had a number of qualified applicants we had to disappoint this year..." It was nice to think, "Wow, they liked me best!"

Unfortunately, within 24 hours of learning of my acceptance at Baltimore, I was also informed of my rejection from Notre Dame. The stupid thing is, I knew it was coming. I saw people posting on the blogs that they had been accepted, or wait-listed. But I kept thinking maybe, just maybe. But I was wrong. I was so foolish to go into this year believing I could have gotten in at ND when only 6 students are accepted for prose out of several hundred that apply.

My acceptance at Baltimore doesn't mean I will be heading off to the east coast any time soon. I am debating whether or not I am willing to go into around $50K in debt for a program I am not necessarily hell-bent on going to. Don't get me wrong, I would love to go to Baltimore and participate in a program that is ranked in the top 100 MFA programs, and the top 10 distinctive MFA programs in the US. But there are no teaching assistantships or opportunities provided by the school and little to no funding in an expensive urban area.

So here is the new update:

Baltimore-Accepted
George Mason-Waitlisted
UNCW-Waitlisted
Arizona-Rejected
Columbia College-Rejected
Hunter College-Rejected
Notre Dame-Rejected
Hollins-??
Arkansas-??

I guess for now I can at least rejoice in my acceptance, even if it was a little bitter-sweet. Good bye Notre Dame... maybe next year...

Rejection #3

University of Arizona rejection came in the mail today. Still stings. Bleh. 3 rejections, 2 wait-lists, and still no word from Notre Dame. Patience is a virtue I guess...

Hope, hope, hope, hope, hope

MFA Blogs, Speakeasy Forums and Driftless House, OH MY!

As an MFA applicant, I have been wrapped up in checking several online locations to see who has been admitted/wait-listed/rejected from where and when they received the info --- sometimes several times each hour. I mean, I am seriously crazy right now. I've been stressing myself out so badly that I couldn't come to work on Monday because I had a kink in my neck. I could barely get out of bed.

The MFA Blog has a mailbag, where people post their thoughts and news on a blog.
The Speakeasy Forum on P&W has different threads to write in, ala "Damn... I didn't get in!" or "I'M IN!!!" or even "The Waiting Game... Have You Heard Yet?"
Driftless House has become my favorite, though, as it posts a list of every MFA program and when the first acceptance was.

And now I see another crop of people writing about receiving acceptance phone calls and email wait-list notifications from the University of Arizona. My rejection will probably come in the mail tomorrow or Monday, putting me at 3 rejections, 2 wait-lists, 0 acceptances, and only 1 sliver of hope that I will get in somewhere with funding, which just so happens to be a school that only accepts 6 people per genre and is in the top 25 in the country----- Notre Dame.

God Help Me

Columbia and the Smoking Hiatus

I received yet another rejection last night. Columbia College Chicago has officially declared my writing less than worthy of their MFA in Fiction Writing program. I realize that my ultimate goal revolves around teaching Memoir, Non-Fiction, Autobiography, etc, but the MFA at Columbia has a dual degree option, combining an MFA in Fiction Writing with an MA in Teaching Writing. It was such a beautiful idea. And now it is gone. I thought the rejections would get easier as they came, but of course that was a lofty ideal. The sting is just as sharp.

This news brings my current status to Rejections-2, Wait-Lists-2, No Word-5. Bleh. And still no word from Notre Dame. Patience.

The sadness I felt from hearing the rejection letter as Danny read it to me over the phone could only be cured by experiencing true joy, in it's purest of forms. By this I mean (drum roll) a trip to In-N-Out. Yes, I know... what about the diet? Er, excuse me... life-style change? I figured I deserved a break from all of the rejection, and In-N-Out is the best place to take a break. Of course, Danny and I agreed to roll our fat asses out of bed this morning and hit the gym to ease the damage. After 1 hour of cardio and ab workouts, I felt like I was going to hack my brains out from all the coughing.

Hence, the reference to smoking in the title. Yes, my dear friends and creepy stalker readers, it is that time. As much as I enjoy sucking in the warm taste of tobacco and feeling the rush of nicotine-ey goodness, I have decided to take a smoking hiatus. If I really want to lose weight... If I want to be able to get out of bed in the morning and not feel like the King of Nasal Problems is wrapping himself around my face... I need to call it quits. I am not promising forever - just 30 days. I figure if I allow myself the idea that I can smoke again one day, it might be a little easier than the word FOREVER, which drives me insane. But the true hope is that when I wake up on April 11th I will think to myself, "maybe just one more day."

Wait-List #2 + Fun Trip Things!!!

I broke down yesterday and called all of the schools I have yet to hear from. I felt it was my right as an applicant not to have a hernia over waiting. Here is what I was told:

Arizona: no admissions decisions for creative non-fiction have been sent out (yay!)

Baltimore: no admissions decisions have been made (double yay!)

Columbia: some admissions decisions have been sent out, but not all (not as big of a yay, but still good)

George Mason: wait-listed and midway on the list, meaning i have a 25-30% chance of getting in... the email was sent to the wrong address (awesome!)

Hollins: no admissions decisions have been made (cool!)

Notre Dame: no admissions decisions for prose have been made (BEST NEWS EVER!!!)

So I can breathe now, knowing I haven't been completely rejected. And now I still have hope for Notre Dame!! FINGERS CROSSED!!!

Also on the "news" front - Danny and I have purchased tickets to visit our friends Tucker and Amanda in South Carolina during the first week of May! We are so excited. Tucker and Amanda are two really great people. We can't wait to see them and experience Charleston and Myrtle Beach. And what is also pretty great is that if I end up getting admitted to any of the above schools, we are taking a long enough trip that I could fly to visit one of them one day while we are out there! So much fun!

New News

So I may have spoken too quickly the other day. It looks like the University of Arizona has not yet notified any fiction/non fiction applications of acceptances as of yet. Sad new though: Notre Dame notified their acceptances yesterday. So here are the stats as of now:

University of North Carolina-Wilmington (waitlisted)

Hunter College (rejected)

Columbia College Chicago (assumed rejection)

George Mason University (assumed rejection)

University of Arkansas (assumed rejection)

University of Notre Dame (assumed rejection)

Hollins University

University of Arizona

University of Baltimore

I have officially decided that if I do not get in anywhere, I will take a deep breath, keep writing and apply again next year.

Application Status

As someone who has been obsessing over Driftless House and Poets and Writers Speakeasy forums, I have gotten a brutal dose of reality. My top choice schools have already dished out what I can assume is most of their acceptances. Here is where I currently stand:

University of North Carolina-Wilmington (waitlisted)

Hunter College (rejected)

Columbia College Chicago (assumed rejection)

George Mason University (assumed rejection)

University of Arizona (assumed rejection)

University of Arkansas (assumed rejection)

Hollins University

University of Baltimore

University of Notre Dame

The final 3 on the list are the only schools who have yet to send out any acceptances. Thank God one of them is my top choice. I really hope I end up lucky on this one....

School List

It occurred to me recently that I have never posted a list of schools I am applying to...

Columbia College Chicago

(Dual Program: MFA in Creative Writing/MA in Teaching)

George Mason University

(MFA in Creative Writing)

Hollins University

(MFA in Creative Writing)

Hunter College

(MFA in Creative Writing)

University of Arizona

(MFA in Creative Writing)

University of Arkansas

(MFA in Creative Writing)

University of Baltimore

(MFA in Creative Writing & Publishing Arts)

University of North Carolina-Wilmington

(MFA in Creative Writing)

University of Notre Dame

(MFA in Creative Writing)

Notre Dame, Here I Come! (for a weekend)

On Thursday night I will be flying out to visit Notre Dame. I cannot express in words how thrilled I am. I cannot wait to see the campus, experience the community and take part in the deeply rooted tradition that is both the university and the Notre Dame home game weekend. These are just a few of the things I will be doing while I visit ND this weekend:

1. Going to Mass in the Basilica of the Sacred Heart
2. Visiting Touchdown Jesus
3. Lighting a candle at the Grotto
4. Going to the Friday Night Pep Rally at the Irish Green
5. Getting Dinner at Eddy Street Commons
6. Watching the Midnight Drummer's Circle
7. Feeding the ducks at St. Mary's Lake
8. Lining up to wish the football team luck after their pre-game mass at the Basilica
9. Attending the football game vs. Navy
10. Eating at Fat Shirley's
11. Meeting with the Creative Writing Department regarding my application
12. Buying ridiculous amounts of Notre Dame souvenirs/apparel
13. Taking a look at graduate student housing!
14. Walking through the Notre Dame Stadium Tunnel\
15. Get drinks at the Linebacker Lounge

Tetris and the Irish

I have been a huge Tetris fan since I was around 10 or 11 years old. Currently, I have a free version on my computer called Sporktris, and my boyfriend Danny enjoys teasing me about my obsessive nature when it comes to this wonderful, finger-aching, time consuming game. I love leaving one column open, building up the rest, and then knocking out four rows at a time. Not too many people know that doing it this way gives you more points than getting rid of the rows one at a time.

Today was a big Tetris game for me.

For the past week, Danny and I have been talking about visiting Notre Dame. We want to go so that we have a weekday and a weekend day at ND so I can get a tour and visit the Creative Writing Department while they are open on a Friday and, of course, so we can see a football game on Saturday. We went back and forth about what weekend, tried to figure out what tickets to get and see if we even had enough money to take a trip before Thanksgiving (yikes!) It didn't look like it was going to work. My work couldn't guarantee I could take off work during the week before thanksgiving... plane tickets were priced ridiculously high due to it being the weekend before a holiday... football tickets were non-existent... and hotels in South Bend are priced at $200 a room due to it being a home game weekend.

But then today happened, and everything fell in to place. Not even just the things we were hoping for, but circumstances far beyond my personal hopes. My parents are giving us a free ticket, knocking out $350. We found INCREDIBLE tickets online, and this kind man knocked a huge chunk off of the price because Danny's grandfather is an alum of ND, saving us $100.

Danny's best friend has a "really cool aunt" living in Chicago (where we are flying in) that is going to let us stay with her zero dollars, getting rid of what could have been $250-$300 in hotel costs. We might also get to use their car (still in the works) which would save us another $100 on renting one. Lastly, Danny's brother is in the Naval Academy, and ND will be playing Navy on the 7th, a game that all students at the Naval Academy get to attend. We will not only get to see his brother Jordan, we will get to spend much needed quality time with him. Danny is also going to help me study for the GRE on the plane, because the test is the day after we get back! (CRAZY!!! hahaha) Plus, I will probably get to visit Columbia College Chicago, which is my number 2 graduate school choice, for an hour or so.

It's like all of the little blocks, the blue L shape, the pink backwards L shape, the red Z shape, the yellow backward Z shape, and the orange rotatable T, were all in this weird arrangement that kind of fit, but there was something huge missing. Then the wonderful green long block graced the screen, and fell into the far left column that was still empty, and everything came together. It's wonderful. I cannot wait for this weekend. :)

GRE Freak Out

I specifically chose schools that did not require the GRE because I did not want to take the GRE. Well, apparently I have been falling fast in love with Notre Dame and happened to misread their application requirements. What I read as "we do not require the GRE test" actually said "we do not require the GRE subject test." The general test, however, IS required.

And now I am officially freaking out! I signed up for the GRE last Monday to take on November 9th so I could apply at a few back up schools that have extended deadlines if I don't get in anywhere. But now I will HAVE to send in my scores to Notre Dame even if they are horrible. I am terrified! I am so in love with Notre Dame and want so badly to attend as a graduate student. But it could all be thwarted simply because I didn't read the requirements correctly.

Damn it!

I really hope I can some how pull an amazing score out of nowhere. This is all I have wanted for a really long time. I want to be in a community of writers who are not only challenged by writing, but by God as well. And I am nervous that all of my hard work over the past 4 months might be a waste.

Visiting Notre Dame? Maybe? PLEASE?

I have begun my quest/obsession to not only visit Notre Dame before I mail in my application in December (so I can enjoy it before they turn me down), but to also visit on a Saturday, when there is an at home football game in play, that I will have tickets to.

Hopefully the plan will go as follows:

My work, understanding how phenomenally important this is to my future, as well as to my ultimate happiness, will grant me the two days off I will need to make it a wonderful 4 day weekend. Then, my dad, knowing that as a young professional I am usually pretty tight with my budget, will offer to give me a free ticket to fly out to Notre Dame, ultimately slicing the price of my ticket to $0. Our next move will be to find and purchase two tickets to see Notre Dame play UConn, which we will miraculously be able to BUY IT NOW for under $200 total. Don't forget, we will some how find an incredibly cheap room in Chicago, as well as a wonderful rental car to drive.

Lastly, I will be accepted at Notre Dame on the spot when I turn in my application, and Jimmy Clausen will tell me he loves my writing.

Oh how the world could work.

WE ARE ND. GO IRISH!!!!

20 Reasons Why I Love the Irish

I have only been aware of the University of Notre Dame’s existence for about 2 years, but I have completely and entirely fallen in love with ND for many reasons. Some of them are in reference to my future attendance as a graduate student (hopefully) and some are sentimental reasons. Here they are:

01) I love that the football player's don't have their last names on the backs of their jersey's. They do this because it isn't about the individual, it is about the team

02) I love Touchdown Jesus

03) I love that their slogan is "Fighting for (insert reason). What would you fight for." It's absolutely beautiful.

04) I love that students in the graduate MFA program get to go to school for free.

05) I love the community atmosphere emitted from every pore of every square foot, every student, every thing on that campus.

06) I love Jimmy Clausen.

07) I love shouting "We are ND! GO IRISH" when I watch football games with my boyfriend Danny.

08) I love that Danny's grandfather, Rudolph, was on the Championship Football Team in 1942.

09) I love that Rudolph told Danny that the movie Rudy was made about him.

10) I love that when I think about Notre Dame, I get this happy feeling about my future.

11) I love that I have the possibility of attending a school that is just a bigger, better, more famous, highly regarded version of APU, where I received my undergraduate degree.

12) I love that it gets really, really cold in South Bend in the winter.

13) I love that it snows in South Bend.

14) I love that South Bend has seasons.

15) I love wearing green, which will go perfectly with being Irish.

16) I love that students have the opportunity to be selected for Teaching Assistantships.

17) I love that Notre Dame is committed to both God and Academia.

18) I love that there is a GPA requirement for athletes.

19) I love that Notre Dame looks the way it does.

20) I love that Notre Dame has been called "the place where the church does it's thinking."