Poet. Pirate. Pilgrim. President.

One of my dad’s favorite stories to tell me as a child was that we (the Collett Family) are descendants of a famous poet, a well known pirate, a pilgrim, and a president. I always rolled my eyes because even though my dad tells some outlandish stories that can only be true because he is Steve Collett, this one just always seemed a little far-fetched. It also didn’t help that he couldn’t remember any of their names, considering it was something he was so proud of. A poet, a pirate, a pilgrim and a president. I couldn’t care less unless one of them was Irish.

For as long as I can remember, I have wanted to be Irish. My friend Whitney has the most beautiful, deep, dark, red hair, and I am always jealous of the gingers that walk around with their heads gloriously aflame. But, alas, the light, strawberry tones in my mane are barely recognizable. Even my boyfriend tells me I am blonde (which I am not, bee-tee-double u). If I can’t be a red-head, I would at least settle for a super obvious last name, like an O’Malley, O’Brien, or McLaughlin… basically any of the O’s or Mc’s would do. Or maybe Doyle, or Finnegan (although, I think Jillian Finnegan sounds like a cartoon name). My good friend Laura Roland had the most beautiful maiden name – McGranaghan.

But no… I am just a frumpy, blonde, Collett.

That’s how I felt about where I came from until about 3 months ago, when I met the Collett family for a huge birthday celebration at a swanky Laguna Beach restaurant. It was the first time since my cousin Dana’s wedding in 2004 that I could remember this many of us being together, and it was the first time I was old enough to drink with everyone, as well as the first time anyone took me seriously as a young adult.

It was probably one of the most wonderful evenings I have had in my life. Not only were we all incredibly loud and obviously intoxicated, but my face hurt so bad when I left from laughing so hard, I could still feel it the next day.

I have always felt a little bit insecure about who I am. I am short, tubby and have a HUGE personality. I laugh loudly, crack inappropriate jokes, and I can be pretty damn crass. I enjoy hard alcohol in the right company and drink quickly. I’m very liberal for a Christian, and I live and love passionately, and unapologetically. These are all things I actually really enjoy about myself.

But when I spend time with my mom’s family, I always feel a little out of place. All of them are super-super religious conservative, look down on drinking, and most of them are easily irritated and quickly offended. Most of the things that come out of my mouth are considered rude, obnoxious or offensive. I spend most of our family gatherings either on edge trying to fit in, or purposefully trying to piss everyone off because I am sick of censoring myself. I always loved this group of people, but was very unsure of how I fit into the family.

On that night in June, as the Collett Family was sitting around 5 tables squished together, drinking, laughing, telling jokes and stories (some of them too outlandish to be true, but WERE in fact true) I finally realized where I am from. I finally understood where I fit in, why I am who I am.

I’m a Collett, and I couldn’t be happier, or more proud.

Distractions and Such

I am taking a note from another MFA Blog / Driftless House lurker and creating a Top Ten Ways to Distract Myself from Obsessing Ridiculously, and Almost Sickeningly, Too Much About Graduate School Admissions list. Or to put it shortly, my TTWtDMfORaASTMAGSA list. :)

10. Watch One Tree Hill from beginning to end (yes, all 6 seasons)

9. Scour the internet for low residency programs I can apply to if I move quickly, or full residency programs that have spring admittance dates (ok, so this one is kind of cheating - but at least I'm not wallowing in my own rejection depression, right?)

8. Write blog posts about ways to distract myself from obsessing ridiculously about graduate school admissions, and be way to disclosing about personal issues.

7. Decorate the guest room in my apartment.

6. Go through the iTunes Top Singles list and pick at least 20 new songs to download... then downloading them illegally from LimeWire.

5. Drink an unhealthy amount of Coors Lights and expensive red wine.

4b. Play Tetris on my cell phone or computer until it is hard to fall asleep at night without picturing a Tetris screen and having dreams about pushing blocks into the right spot.

4a. Playing Winterbells (http://www.ferryhalim.com/orisinal/g3/bells.htm)

3. Work on my writing for my writing workshop (which is due on Saturday... yikes!)

2. Eat pasta even though I'm on a diet.

1.  Smoke a ridiculous amount of cigarettes.

Vegas Baby!

Danny took me to Vegas for my 23rd birthday at the end of February... (YES I'M 23 NOW!!!) We ate the Bellagio buffet, gambled at the MGM and Planet Hollywood, drank too many Gin & Tonics at the Aria, had delicious Italian food at the Venetian, walked so much our feet hurt, placed bets and hung out with some friends from home in a sports bar, walked out of 'O' with an inner tube and roll of toilet paper, and had someone walk in on us in our hotel room at 1:30am.

Needless to say, it was eventful. Here are some pics :)

Notre Dame, Here I Come! (for a weekend)

On Thursday night I will be flying out to visit Notre Dame. I cannot express in words how thrilled I am. I cannot wait to see the campus, experience the community and take part in the deeply rooted tradition that is both the university and the Notre Dame home game weekend. These are just a few of the things I will be doing while I visit ND this weekend:

1. Going to Mass in the Basilica of the Sacred Heart
2. Visiting Touchdown Jesus
3. Lighting a candle at the Grotto
4. Going to the Friday Night Pep Rally at the Irish Green
5. Getting Dinner at Eddy Street Commons
6. Watching the Midnight Drummer's Circle
7. Feeding the ducks at St. Mary's Lake
8. Lining up to wish the football team luck after their pre-game mass at the Basilica
9. Attending the football game vs. Navy
10. Eating at Fat Shirley's
11. Meeting with the Creative Writing Department regarding my application
12. Buying ridiculous amounts of Notre Dame souvenirs/apparel
13. Taking a look at graduate student housing!
14. Walking through the Notre Dame Stadium Tunnel\
15. Get drinks at the Linebacker Lounge

Halloween

I don’t like to party, and I don’t dress like a skank. These are the reasons why Halloween is my least favorite holiday.

What is it about Halloween? Why is this the one night of the year when it is completely socially acceptable for girls to dress like sluts? Why is it a night when it is the norm to get hammered?

I will be honest, if I had an incredible body, I would show it off a bit more. If I were 21, I would probably drink on a more regular basis.

But there is a level when it gets pushed too far. Our society has forgotten what the word ‘moderation’ means. We eat and eat and eat, and wonder why we get fat. We drink and drink and drink and wonder why we can’t go a day without a few shots. We smoke and smoke and smoke, then wonder why we have lung cancer (trust me, I am at fault on this one). And we sleep around and dress like skanks and do what we please, and wonder why we end up pregnant, date-raped, and full of diseases.

We need to take better care of our bodies. We need to recognize that holidays like this aren’t the only times to have fun. We need to enjoy ourselves on a more regular basis, so that it doesn’t get all pent up and spew out on a crazy night like Halloween.

Oh well. At least I will be in the Clause office all night. No hangovers for me.